Fisher’s Lament

by Angie Mansfield

As I sat there, soaking sunshine
Quietly enjoying springtime,
Listening to birdies chirping
With my pole upon the shore,
I spied my bobber dipping quickly,
Back up again, then down hardcore.

"Aha!" I said, tensing, ready,
Gripping tightly, hands held steady,
Waiting for the tell-tale pulling,
That would signal dinner sure.
I waited for as long as I could,
Gave a pull -- fish there no more!

Cursing gently, hooked a new worm,
Laughing as I watched him squirm,
Tossed him in the water warm,
Sat back again to wait once more.
Sunshine warming, eyes were drooping,
Soon I was gently snoozing, waiting as I was before.

A gentle tug jerked me alert,
Like a caffeine pill advert,
My eyes no beauty could divert
From my bobber dipping gaily,
Like a housewife churning butter
In those cliche'd days of yore.

This time I would get the big jerk,
Fry him up with a great smirk,
Or I swore I'd go berserk,
And never fish again without an oar
To beat the water in frustration
Now pay attention - don't get cocksure!

I held on, firmly forcing patience,
Picturing my coming vengeance
On the swimming fiend that I abhorred.
A nearby fisher offered guidance,
I turned to decline his unasked-for brilliance,
Felt a jerk, then fish's absence; called the "helper" a meddling...creep.

I stood there for a time, head aching
While my eye was quickly twitching,
As I tried to keep my temper from exploding like before.
Then I slowly brought up my pole,
Snapped it in two with a great pull,
And left to take up video games INDOORS.

Angie Mansfield, perhaps unsurprisingly, lives alone with her dog and a jade plant named Fred. Yes, her plant has a name. You can find more of her failed attempts at journalistic integrity at the Zebra Rag.


  1. Very funny, and perfect for this month! Notice I didn't say anything about your bobbers or the tell-tale pulling of someone's pole.

  2. LOL! I was thinking the same thing, Beth! Nice job Ang!

  3. And here I was so looking forward to a twss... :-P

    Thanks, ladies!

  4. I'll say it! TWSS!

    One of your best, Angie! I like the creep part.

  5. Well played. I was waiting for a fish to start taunting you with "eat my shorts."

  6. Well, I thought about it, but I decided it was a little crass for such a serious work of poetry.



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