Bag Lady

Every couple of months I discover some rank odor coming from my purse. It's a Mary Poppins bag. Everything and anything goes in there and sometimes it doesn't come out. My most recent cleansing produced the most interesting assortment of contents. Some you'd expect to find: keys, wallet, cell phone. Others I'd completely forgotten about and was rather suprised to find them.
  1. Diapers. You never know.
  2. A bag of goldfish
  3. Matchbox cars
  4. My Little Ponies
  5. A thermometer
  6. A rectal thermometer (don't mix those up)
  7. Horse feed
  8. A naughty nurse uniform
  9. Alphabet flashcards (they don't go with the uniform)
  10. Sugar cubes
  11. Chic Fil A ranch dipping sauce
  12. A book
  13. A kindle (I don't own one)
  14. An expired juice box
  15. Some kind of herb in a baggy. (have no idea how that got there)
  16. Sunglasses I thought I'd lost.
  17. Army Men (not real ones. That'd be freaking awesome)
  18. A cricket
  19. Rocks
  20. A pair of mypanties (clean)
  21. Portable DVD player. (been looking for that)
  22. Your mom.


  1. I hope they were goldfish crackers and not actual goldfish. Just sayin. THAT would have been stinky.

  2. Darn those little (unreal) Army men!

    Awesome post. :)

  3. Baggie! You always make me smile. So do Army Men. . .

  4. Thanks, Trish. Nope, they were a bag of goldfish still in the water. TOTALLY forgot we decided to get pet fish.

    Amy and Janna, yes...army men. Hmmmm.

  5. Yay Harley! Now I can tell my husband that he is wrong; there IS someone on Earth who would be better prepared for life's little catastrophes than me. (You never know when you'll need a rotten gold fish. Seriously.)

  6. I was wondering where my mom disappeared to. Guess I can call off the search now.

  7. Carole, yes. I am prepared for an apocolypse where horses need feeding and we can toke up. I mean....

    Angie, you can get her back. I demand a book deal. Or iPhone.

  8. *snicker* I love the army men! I wouldn't mind finding a couple of male hula dancers in my purse. *wiggles brows*

  9. I can cure that desire for male hula dancers.


    (Not technically a hula dancer, but still)


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.